Ensuring Domestic Tranquility

I encountered a question recently by a man whose girlfriend is being stalked by a large ex-boyfriend.

“How do I prepare myself to fight a much bigger opponent.  Are there any tips or tricks?”

As a pastor who is also a martial artist and combatives trainer, my advice is as follows – for all such circumstances:

1. Be realistic.  This isn’t a movie and you’re not Bruce Willis or John Wayne.  Cover yourself legally and relationally asap. Talk with her and make sure there are not any “entangling” issues here that create a problem for you that you do not need. Orders of protection? Previous charges? Is she consciously or unconsciously egging him on? Does she like the drama of two guys fighting over her?  Full disclosure time! Get on record with the police if necessary if there have been threats or incidents.

2. Be intelligently proactive. Avoid any potential confrontation or tactically compromising situations.  Switch restaurants, hangouts, or routes home.  Just be smart! 99% of these situations can be avoided by thinking instead of emotively reacting. Don’t try to be a hero.  He’s not worth it.

3. Begin/continue training. There are no “tips” for defeating a larger opponent, and no replacement for hours and sweat (ie no microwave solution). Training improves your timing, distance, reaction time, and weapons-on-target effectiveness. The more you train the more combative variables you are able to overcome (subject weight, gender, training, ability, etc.).  In other words, you have to dig your well before you need a drink.  The time to start training is now! Contact me if you need help in this department.

Stay safe brother!


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